Feeling Camouflage

Jeeze! Talk about writers block, I have just spent 15 minutes staring at the screen not knowing how to even start this post. I stopped writing for a bit. Not for any particular reason, I just never pushed myself to write. For a while I figured no one was really reading any of this anyway, so why write? WRONGO! Although I have been keeping up on actual paper, I feel like it's still important for me to write on my blog. If not for someone to read it, for my sanity. Since the last time I posted I have been going through a good patch. Life has been good to me, my body has been behaving and so have my legs (for the most part). After the new year I moved back into my little Hobbit House. No matter how hard it is to live on my own, it is so worth it. I love being in my own private space where I can do anything that I like, whenever I want. Don't get me wrong being home for the holidays was nice and I had fun. It's just too much sometimes and I loose a lot of my Independence. Living on my own pushes me to do as much as I possibly can on my own. There are still many things I need help with but I have incredible friends.
       Since I moved back I have been spending a lot of time with me, myself and I. It has been really great!! Time with myself allows me to spend time on things that are important to me like painting, writing, volunteering, physical therapy and much more. Though this time is well spent, I am craving spending more time with my friends.  It feels like I'm in a strange transition stage of life. I am no longer going to school and all of my friends are either finishing up college or they now have official 9 to 5 jobs. I haven't been to kappa since last august. Getting into the kappa house has become so difficult for me and it isn't ADA friendly AT ALL. (but that's a whole other story) It has prevented me from going to meetings and seeing all my kappa girls. Good thing this would be my last semester otherwise I'd be even more bitter. I will say I do feel completely out of the loop. Maybe that's OK though.. Anyway I'm missing the full force of kappa friendships.
        I have started volunteering at the Utah PRIDE center and right now it's my favorite thing to do! The pride center is where I wanted to end up after college. And though I am just a volunteer with no pay, I do believe in the long run I might be able to get a job. That really would be a dream come true. I really do need a paying job though.. I am teaching a friend to speak English three times a week. I have a good time and I make some pocket money. If anyone knows of anywhere I could work at please please "holla at yo girl!"

I hope this little post has informed you a bit on how I am surviving the everyday hustle of my life and i look forward to seeing more of you.



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